By Anis Shivani
After thirty-five years of living in Dubai as a guest worker, Ram Pillai, prone more often now to a weariness of the bones, if not yet an ache of the heart, is leaving. He must bid goodbye, before the end of the week, to his greatest benefactors. Some of them have died, and others wouldn’t remember him. But most are still around. The former Bedu might have lost all visible traces of estrangement from the city of lights and arguments, the once-green Emirati with an eagerness to spout off knowledge of “the way the British used to manage things†might no longer show such insecurity, and the abaya-wearing native women might walk with a little more pep in their step and a little more stiffness, but you can’t tell Ram that in all the ways that matter, Dubai isn’t still a shy bride, a virginal flower, a shadow in search of itself, and that only coaxing and coquetry work, force of any kind the banned substance in this most seductive of the Emirates.
His decision is somewhat sudden, as his friends in the labor camps have already claimed, but wasn’t it always inevitable? It’s neither as simple, nor as complicated, as the conviction of impending mortality. He’s only fifty-five, even if the strong Gulf sun has sapped the strength out of his body and soul. His years of hard labor were few and long ago. Still, how real is his good health? He doesn’t know. He also doesn’t know where he’ll go back to in India. His devout father and mother, in the Kerala village he came from, are long dead. Over the decades, he’s had news that his small fishing community, off the Malabar Coast, has nearly emptied; the young people have gravitated to the larger towns, much as he, in 1972, packed his belongings in a small bundle to leave for Trivandrum, resolved to quickly earn the money to pay a recruiting agent the necessary fee to secure a coveted place among the shiploads of people embarking then for the wealthy Emirates. Something tells him he must leave Dubai before he’s made to; why, after decades of never having had the slightest run-in with the authorities, he should fear this, he doesn’t know.
The mistakes of judgment Ram made in his youth, added to the complications of having overstayed his original two-year work permit, have long ago ceased to bother him. He has justified his silent bargain to his own satisfaction. Law and justice are abstract constructions, generalities which concrete facts usually make a mockery of. At the public library, which Ram has begun to frequent in recent years, he’s become fond of Santayana. He has a difficult time understanding such philosophers, even in accessible translation, but he is more than ever convinced that self-sacrifice is not the Holy Grail orthodox belief makes it out to be. Still, Ram’s past is beginning to rear its monstrous head when he least expected it, as his heart becomes less supple and his body a less wieldy instrument. If only he could tell someone! If only there were someone to unburden with! But he hasn’t whispered a word of his secret to his most trusted friends. They know Ram has some leverage whereby he can remain in Dubai unmolested, in an “illegal†status, for a lifetime, but out of respect for his apparent sadness, they’ve observed limits in inquiring what advantage he’s acquired.
Already, well before noon, the most devout among the Emirati worshippers are making their way to the Grand Mosque, their flowing white dishdashas starched and sparkling, their headscarves tightly tied by the black aghal. It used to be, at one of Ram’s first jobs, at a construction site on Sheikh Zayed Road, near the present Golf Club, that he would sometimes accompany Muslim workers to the mosque, despite his own Hindu origins; Islam, like Hinduism, has had little attraction for him, but it was either that or, instead of the hourlong Friday prayer break from the dusty screaming site, taking only twenty minutes for lunch at one of the hot roadside tandoors set up for Indian laborers. The mosque is the only place in Dubai where national and foreigner, citizen and guest, rich and poor, stand side by side, see each other’s faces without feint or filter. In the mosque, all faces are empty of demand.
Al-Maktoum Bridge takes him to Al-Rasheed Road, off which he takes crowded side streets to get to his old friend Krishan’s fabric shop in the ancient Deira district. Notices to tear down the ramshackle building which Krishan’s shop fronts have been issued since the time the tallest building in Dubai was a few stories high, not even easily visible from the wharves. Krishan deals with a Muslim middleman whose job it is to pay off the busybody civil servants with nothing better to do than harass honest businessmen with vain threats.
In the early years there used to be mounds of spices outdoors — ah, pungent red chilies six inches long, bright as a new bride’s smile, stacked impossibly high! — but the newest and poorest of Asians now prefer to buy indoors, in the spice emporiums. Other than the occasional Western tourist, there are few resident white faces in traditional shopping districts like Deira. Over the years, the brazenness of Western visitors in such neighborhoods has visibly declined; now they act apologetically, as if they owe their presence to the sufferance of their kind hosts, speaking politely with the Indians, Pakistanis, Bangladeshis, Sri Lankans, Indonesians, and Filipinos who’re otherwise treated as invisible actors in fashionable Dubai.
“Memsahib,†Ram says, tipping his cap, to a middle-aged European woman in a long pink dress, bargaining with a street vendor over “pearl†jewelry.
The fondness of the Westerner for expensive junk is limitless. These are the same people who patronize the Emirates’ many museums, which have risen rapidly to mummify the extinction of the pearling industry, the Bedouin habitat, the obligations of kinship, as fast as these old ways of life are becoming dated. These are the type of people who spend entire days in the “heritage villages†in the Emirati hinterland, observing the feeding and milking of camels by the stern Bedu, and who can’t tell that the many “forts†constructed along the Arabian Gulf, from Abu Dhabi to Ra’s al Khaimah, are actually of recent construction, made to look like antiquities.
But Ram’s forgiveness knows no bounds today. He is, after all, bidding farewell to the fond familiar sights. He expects whatever town he relocates to in India, perhaps after he’s taken a young wife, to immerse him soon in its vastly reduced level of energy. And this isn’t something entirely to regret. One gets old.
“Is brother Krishan here?†Ram asks Krishan’s older son, Ganesh, inside the shop crammed with cotton and silk fabrics in every available cranny. Ganesh seems to be trying to fix the broken cash register.
“Not here today,†Ganesh says peremptorily. “In Sharjah. Fridays, always dedicated to Sharjah. Mondays and Tuesdays, Abu Dhabi. Wednesdays, he goes over to Fujairah— maybe to set up a new shop there. If you need to talk to him about anything related to the business here, he won’t know.†Ganesh stretches his chest, sturdy as a block of bricks. “Ask me. Ask me anything.â€
The years of schooling in India have left little impact on Ganesh, as rough and crude as ever. Ram physically backs off. There is a smell coming from Ganesh, as of a raw animalism, that frightens Ram. He feels weak and vulnerable. “What would I ask you?â€
Ganesh smiles monstrously. “I don’t have to ask you anything. I know you’re jumping ship. I heard already. From Mustafa, your old buddy. And Jivan. And Patel. All the Patels. Everyone knows you’re abandoning Dubai. I wonder why. Why would a man still in his prime†— Ganesh shushes Ram’s protest — “still able to earn at least a thousand dirhams a month, and no expenses, mind you, no family to support in India — why would such a man want to go to a home that isn’t a home, where there’s nothing to return to? What did India ever do for you? The future is here, man.â€
“I’ve lived here long enough, haven’t I?†Ram is edgy, lost, defensive. “I was here when you weren’t yet born. I’ve seen this city grow and grow, until it’s — it’s something I hardly understand.†Ganesh snickers, which makes Ram even more apologetic. “I’m not anybody who matters. I’ve paid for my little share of this crazy development, this gigantic construction — with blood, sweat, and tears. Do I not have the right to retire?â€
“Retirement?†Ganesh spits to the side. “Is that what you’re after? I doubt it, man. What’s the real reason you’re leaving?†He becomes meditative, dismissing with a gruff wave of his hairy hand one of the shop assistants who is trying to get his attention at the door. “Everyone knows you never returned to India to renew your work permit. Not once. And you don’t have a business, like we do, to keep renewing it here. Then how have you been allowed to stay? Wave after wave of deportation drives. I’d say at least a dozen major ones since you’ve been here. There’s some mystery here, and it creates problems for me—for the community. We don’t like people who distrust others.â€
“Your father trusts me well enough.â€
Ganesh spits to the side again. “My father’s an old man who doesn’t know anything.â€
“He’s taken good enough care of you. He owns three shops now.â€
“And one more on the way. I know.†Ganesh laughs viciously. “It’s like having children… Look, I have a busy day ahead. Very busy. Come again tomorrow, if you’re still in Dubai. My father will be here to check the accounts.â€
Ram’s head feels hot and heavy when he steps outside amidst the bustle of pedestrians. What a rude son! Ram’s own lack of family has never caused him to be so frustrated and angry. Perhaps it is the nature of the younger generation not to show respect as a matter of principle. Perhaps there is no real reason for Ganesh’s animosity. But what a rude young man! In all his life, Ram has never spit like a village illiterate. He no longer feels enthusiastic about his plan to fill up all of Friday with farewell visits, to Al-Khabeesi, Al-Baraha, Umm Hureir, Karama, adjoining downtown commercial districts where his old friends, who were good to him in the difficult years, prosper as merchants. In Hor Al Anz is a shop owned by the Lebanese Christian brothers, the Frangiehs, who welcome Ram and discuss, with all the gusto of harmed insiders, Sheikh Mo’s — the ruler, Sheikh Muhammad’s — follies in awarding contracts to large construction firms. The Palms, the World, Ski Dubai, Burj Dubai, these and other projects are discussed over mint tea as if the Frangiehs had a real stake in all this. Ram takes their idle resentment in good spirit, but why should he care about the devious strategies of rich builders? In Mankhool, the Naseris, Iranians, sell girls’ dresses, and imagine their smart nephew, now being educated in Britain, returning to Dubai to start a joint venture in Dubai Internet City. And there are others, none of whom ever talk about leaving Dubai, for any reason. Even the worst-off among the labor camp residents, inclined to strike and riot in recent years, only want their living conditions to be improved.
The Friday prayer is in full swing. The city is on hold — as silent as it is possible for Dubai to be, although the non-Muslim workers at the innumerable construction locales are busy orchestrating their staccato clanging and banging to remind the worshippers what Dubai is all about. Ram decides to go home. His belongings after all these years are very few — mostly his spotless clothes, especially white shirts, bought at steep discounts from the better stores along Sheikh Zayed Road, after the end of the annual January Shopping Festival. His one persistent memory of India is of a secondary school teacher inviting him home for snacks and beverages to discuss ignored Malayalam writers. That afternoon it rained so hard even the boisterous children glad of the drenching went back inside their homes after a while. In the old teacher’s courtyard, the leafy banana trees bent back in the lash of the rain, like old people sustaining crooked bones.
Ram stops at one of the disappearing traditional snack vendors by the Clock Tower on Abu Baker Siddique Road. He buys a plate of fried plantains, then orders another to take home to his roommate, a Sri Lankan Buddhist who speaks only when absolutely necessary. Ram sits on the edge of the long wooden bench outside, watching the morose traffic. The desert compels human beings to keep reverting time and again to naturally slow rhythms, give up their robotic wind-up doll mannerisms. Ram feels in his pants pocket the one-way ticket to Trivandrum he’s already bought. It is so silent unwanted memories return to him.
What happened was, a Sheikh ran over an old man, and Ram saw it.
He was the only one to witness the accident. At a building site which was then far from the center of the city, Ram was taking a break from operating the concrete mixing equipment. His back was giving him trouble. He’d thought his body was indestructible — hadn’t he been the most athletic among his schoolmates? Was there a tree he hadn’t swung from, a creek he hadn’t swum in? The late afternoon prayers had been called, and workers — even Hindus and Christians — were reluctant to resume work. Just before evening prayers were called, the builder, a North Indian man who’d picked up fluent Arabic, would show up to inspect the day’s work, and needlessly grill the workers about wasting materials. The hammering and buzzing were beating a nightmarish track in Ram’s head. He walked a good few blocks away from the work zone, abruptly coming up against the beginnings of the endless desert. If he kept walking south, in the same direction, eventually he would collapse and die. A lonely desert death seemed at that moment a most noble one.
“It is my fault,†the Sheikh said in Arabic, distraught. “I admit it.â€
Ram looked closely at the Sheikh’s face, never to forget the least of its contours for the rest of his life. He was young. The light in his eyes suggested ambition, and even the horror of the moment hadn’t been able to quite extinguish it. His lips were thick, and the trace of a wart on his right cheek only lent his handsome face more character. It seemed as if time slowed down — came to a stop — as the two of them cradled the dead man’s body.
“It is my fault,†the Sheikh repeated.
Was he sensing his young life go up in smoke? Did he have a wife, children? He wasn’t one of the princes, that was clear. If he were, he wouldn’t have been so afraid. Nor was he a Bedouin, he showed too much refinement for that. He was from the intermediate merchant class, who were the real energy in the Emirates, while the princes gave the orders and the people at the bottom performed the grunt work. Ram tried to recall how fast the car was going. It couldn’t have been going too fast. The road didn’t make that possible. Yet how could the Sheikh not have seen the old man? Perhaps the declining sun had blinded his eyes.
“It is no one’s fault,†Ram said in halting English. “His time had come. Look how old he was. It is no one’s fault.â€
The Sheikh stared at Ram for a while, as if wondering whether to take Ram seriously. Then, with huge reluctance written over his face, he agreed, “It is no one’s fault. It is Allah’s will.â€
“Yes, Allah — Ram, God… he was a very old man.â€
“Go,†Ram waved at the Sheikh, conveying to him in faltering English the outline of his plan. The Sheikh would have to promise to make an anonymous call to the police just after sunset. Ram would be nowhere in the picture. “Go!†Ram said more sternly, because the Sheikh wasn’t showing any indication of leaving. Finally, the Sheikh seemed to sense the wisdom of the idea. What was done was done. Only the future mattered now. As long as it was only an accident, and the Sheikh wasn’t at fault… and he wasn’t.
The Sheikh made Ram write down his exact name and full address, his passport number and date of birth, on a notepad he got out of the glove compartment of the Toyota. Upon arrival in the Emirates, a worker had to turn over his passport and work permit to the recruiting agent or the employer, to be returned only at the time of departure. Ram remembered his own details. He never paused to wonder about the wisdom of sharing his identity with the Sheikh. Ram couldn’t help but memorize the license plate number of the Toyota. He couldn’t stop staring at it.
Then it was all over. He was back at the building site in a few minutes, and things went on as before. He had to go to the same location for a week more, but he never took a break, let alone wander over to the location of the accident. A few months later, when he went to his employer, the Indian builder, to ask him to renew his work permit, he was told not to worry about it. The labor ministry had already taken care of it. When the employer died in a freak accident a few more years later, many of Ram’s fellow workers found themselves scrambling to arrange new employment; some had to leave the country. But Ram was immediately contacted by a new and better employer, who said the labor ministry had asked him to. Over the years, whenever Ram has been in a scrape, or about to get into one, a benevolent invisible hand has seemed to pull him out of it, and set him back on course again. Ram has no doubt the Sheikh who killed the old man has been behind it.
“Keef Halak.†The greeting is issued in a commanding voice. “May I speak with you a moment — sir?â€
Ram is finishing the fried plantains. He looks up to see a plump Emirati national wiping the sweat off his thick forehead, and staring at the remains of Ram’s snack as if he finds it a personal affront for anyone to eat in the street. A gleaming black Mercedes is squeezed into the tight parking spot behind his own Datsun. Even before saying yes, Ram wipes off with his palm any imaginary dust and crumbs on the bench next to him, to make room for the stranger. He can be pretty sure who his interlocutor is.
“Shukran,†the Emirati says, sitting down with his legs spread wide. He doesn’t remove his dark sunglasses, taking in the construction clamor emitted from just beyond the horizon of the low-rising buildings in the neighborhood, as if personally approving the continuing spate of action at this normally lax time of the week. “Something about Friday, the end of the week — it makes you take stock of where you’ve been, where you’re going. Doesn’t it? Even if you’re not Muslim. They say our ancestors were great poets. Every man a poet in his home. Imagine, pearl divers, impoverished Bedu, goat herders, dhow-builders, reciting poetry about the beauty of their mundane work. In touch with their essence, their being. A sweet, sweet harmony. But so much has passed away, so rapidly. In another generation — poof ! — no one will have any memory of the ways of our forefathers.†Then he laughs cynically, turning his face to Ram. “But this is all to the good. Sheikh Mo says we must be number one — in everything. There’s nothing difficult about progress. Only cowards are afraid.â€
All this by way of prelude. Ram has heard about them, picking off troublemaking foreigners and journalists, instigating pro-Mo rallies and events, stirring nationalist fervor among students at the University in Al-’Ayn, gleaning information useful to the ruling Al-Maktoum family at all sorts of harmless festivals and celebrations, but he’s never known for sure when he’s been in the presence of one of them. They wear dark glasses, carry symbolic walkie-talkies, drive black Mercedes, and are supposed to have a tad more arrogance than the most inebriated of Emiratis. Not that these are precise identifiers. So he’s finally in the jurisdiction of one! In other Arab countries there is a name for their type — in Iraq, Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, Syria, Egypt: mukhabarat, informers. Officially, Dubai doesn’t have spies of any kind. Officially, sometimes even the police and the military don’t exist. Dubai’s only business is business. Everyone’s at bottom either a businessman, or an enforcer of business norms.
“Does this stuff taste good?†the Emirati asks. “I’ve never tried it.â€
Ram immediately offers the untouched plate of plantains meant for his roommate. The Emirati makes a great show of enjoying the South Asian snack, licking the grease off his thick fingers. “Delicious. It tastes just like — bananas. But I guess that’s what it is. Very filling.†In quick order, he finishes the whole plate, barely taking time to properly chew and swallow. At the end, he licks off all of his fingers snappingly. Then he places Ram’s finished paper plate over his own, and walks the few feet to the nearest trash receptacle, which happens to have on it a colorful depiction of Dubailand, Dubai’s own Disney World. Returning, he says, “Well now, suppose you tell me how you’ve been keeping yourself busy this week? Name’s Muhammad, by the way.†His thick hand doesn’t shake, only grips hard, and Ram feels as if he’s offering his thinner hand in ba’ya, the traditional oath of allegiance.
“Not that we don’t know. First, the one-way ticket to India. That always triggers an investigation, you know. Just to make sure everything’s on the up-and-up. The travel agents are very cooperative. They have to be. I mean, even if a prince in the Al-Maktoum family took out a one-way ticket to Paris — cleanest city in the world, by the way, I love visiting it — we would make sure the Prince’s state of mind was unobjectionable. Then your visits to your friends — and what a diverse group they are, if I may say so. Remarkable. For someone who got his start in the construction industry, to know shopkeepers, budding entrepreneurs, people who have a legitimate shot at investing in the free trade zones — remarkable!â€
“I haven’t worked in hard labor since my first years here…â€
“And that’s the other thing, the transition to clerical work, when you came here as a laborer. Almost unheard of — even if there’s been little promotion. I asked my colleagues to come up with comparable examples, and there don’t seem to be any, for non-Arabs. Remarkable.â€
Despite himself, Ram smiles. “Perhaps I’ve just been lucky. In the right place at the right time.â€
“No, my friend, it’s more than luck. More than sheer resourcefulness, ingenuity, ability. Pretty nearly all your compatriots are blessed with these qualities. And they work hard, all of them work off their butts, but most stay in the same kinds of labor camps they were assigned to begin with — until the day comes to leave, which is nearly always involuntary. But you, my friend, are leaving voluntarily. Remarkable!â€
“Is it a crime to leave Dubai?â€
“Crime? Well now, now that you mention crimes — I wonder…â€
“What is it you’re trying to say?â€
The Emirati looks away. His heavy cell phone tinkles, and he presses the mute button, not checking to see who’s calling. He taps his right foot on the ground, his heavy leather sandal loose enough to almost fall off. “It seems they’re taking three hours now for Friday prayers… Simplicity is better in all things. The simple recourse, the simple explanation, is usually the most elegant. But this principle is always in opposition to the momentum of complexity. Things assume momentum sometimes for the most curious reasons, the most fragile circumstances — coincidences. Yet the momentum for anything has a time limit. People’s patrons — for instance — meet their maker. They die. Their time comes and goes. Then what happens to those they patronize? They’re on their own. Simplicity, you see, returns to its rightful place, and harmony reigns. Beautiful!†Then he abruptly turns to Ram, his face turning a harsher hue. “On the afternoon of September 4, 1974, were you mixing concrete at the construction site of Zaytoonah Mall? For an Indian contractor named Suleiman Shah? Were you on the road to the desert for more than an hour at the time of the ’asr prayer?â€
So he knows everything, Ram thinks. Defense will be useless. The young Sheikh is probably no more. The strings that have been manipulated on his behalf probably no longer have a puller. Has the Sheikh died recently? He would only have been a middle-aged man. Ram feels sorrow overcome him. “What do you want from me?†he complains. He thinks of his Sri Lankan roommate, silent and contemplative even when an employer withheld his wages for two months. He was so undisturbed that the superstitious employer became perturbed and not only paid him the back wages, but also gave him a bonus worth two more months of wages, and promoted him. The world is crazy that way. If you place no demands on it, mostly it goes along with your wishes. They say in India, the monsoons have assumed a most erratic pattern, compared to when Ram was a child, regularity being the byword then. Kerala gets far less rain now than it used to. The tea plantations are suffering. The fish aren’t as plentiful on the Malabar Coast, and they don’t taste as good. This is what he has heard.
“Hayyak. Come, my friend. Let us not waste time.†The Emirati rises, with a hint of what Ram thinks is shame at his overwhelmingly dominant position. “There’s an old building nearby. Functional, unremarkable. On the other side of the creek, on Oud Metha Road —between Old Trinity Church and St. Mary’s Catholic Church. Most people think it’s a watch repair factory. It’s an interesting place. We do a lot of good for Dubai there. People volunteer all sorts of helpful information. We live in a world where information is the cheapest but also the most expensive commodity. And so we think of this building — and you’ll meet some terrific friends of mine there, real veterans, very good friends — we think of it as the nerve center of this metropolis, in some ways. In everything we try to discover the principle of simplicity converging on similar tracks. In the end… well, you’ll see.â€
Ram gets up, a little of the fight returning to him. He’ll deny everything. They have no proof. Whoever has looked out for him all these decades will surely do so again. They just want to make sure he stays in Dubai. Why this would be so, is beyond him, but as long as he remains safe here, he will be fine with staying. He will make that willingness crystal clear at the very beginning of the next interrogation.
“You’d better leave your Datsun here. We’ll take care of it.â€
“Did you know there are almost no incidents of reported rape in Dubai?â€
Muhammad smiles. “I’ve heard that. I’ve heard that.â€
Anis Shivani is the author of ‘My Tranquil War and Other Poems’ (2012), ‘The Fifth Lash and Other Stories’ (2012), ‘Against the Workshop’ (2011), ‘Anatolia and Other Stories’ (2009), and the forthcoming novel ‘Karachi Raj’ (2013). Other books recently finished or in progress include two books of poetry; a novel; and two books of criticism, ‘Literature at the Global Crossroads and Plastic Realism: Neoliberal Discourse in the New American Novel’. Anis’s work appears in the ‘Boston Review’, ‘Threepenny Review’, ‘Iowa Review’, ‘London Magazine’, ‘Cambridge Quarterly’, ‘Times Literary Supplement’, and many other journals.
Editor’s Note: ‘Dubai’ is reprinted from Anis Shivani’s collection ‘Anatolia and Other Stories’, with the kind permission of the author.